Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Ever wondered what a civil war field amputation felt like? Well here's your chance! The smallest dab of this FDA approved battery acid will give you about 25 solid minutes of ineffable pain and inescapable torture. The gallon of milk won't help. The screaming will help a little, but only in a cathartic sort of way. The screaming helps you pretend your making progress from the error of your ways, but its completely optional. Your relatives will look on with a gloomy helplessness as you flail about like a fish out of water with a hook in its eye, wishing to the dear Lord above that you'd never taken that bite. It's absolute misery and horror. Your eyeballs will burn in your skull. Your innards will inflame and eating will suck for about a day afterward. I took one bite and got such a case of gastritis, I didn't eat a regular meal for over two days. This stuff should be taken off the market. It is poison.