Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

...if you're an aspiring writer in need of a primer that gives never-ending examples of what NOT TO DO. I'm working on a teen fantasy novel of my own, and Meyers' Twilight series never fails to remind me of the things I want to completely avoid in my own writing. Let's consult the list, shall we? 1) THE BORING SUE HERIONE. You may have heard of the Mary Sue, the perfect female protagonist who can do no wrong, who has unnatural beauty, who is beloved by all; Bella isn't quite a Mary Sue. She's described (by herself, at least) as plain and is endlessly clumsy (though her clumsiness is so contrived that it seems like a magical Sue ability, practically). She also has no interests, hobbies, or anything that she excels at in particular. Despite these flaws, Bella nevertheless ends up a Sue because everyone loves her for reasons that defy explanation or logic. Even when she is behaving in a selfish, whiny, and intolerable way, Bella is never called out for her behavior. The only character who ever seems disgusted by Bella is Jessica, but since Jessica is written as a shrew anyway, we're clearly not meant to put much stock in her opinion. 2) FATED TRUE LOVE. In my world, Fated True Love isn't romantic, it's lazy. It says "hey, instead of working out why these characters are attracted to each other and showing how their relationship develops, I'm gonna just put it in the hands of FATE and have them fall in love for no reason whatsoever!" Edward loves Bella because she smells good, which means Edward loves Bella like I love freshly baked bread. Bella loves Edward because he's beautiful. God-like. So beautiful...really BEAUTIFUL, in case you missed it in all the numerous descriptive reminders. But really, why do they love each other? I have no idea. Shakespeare was all too aware of the ridiculousness of star-crossed love, which is why he was smart and killed his teenaged lovers off. But Bella and Edward's happiness hinges entirely on their togetherness. What a strong, solid message to send to the young women of the world: happiness isn't something you create for yourself, oh no, it's something you can ONLY find in a beautiful, immortal man. Bella's slow recognition of Jacob as a potential suitor was far more interesting and realistic, and it was teeth-gnashingly disappointing to see Bella repeatedly insist to herself that no one would ever do it for her again but Edward. 3) THE ZERO-HOUR PLOT. Nothing much happens in Meyers' books, aside from Bella's enthrallment/suffering over Edward. In the last few chapters, Meyers will attempt to inject some kind of conflict into the narrative, either in the form of James, Victoria, and Laurent ("Twilight") or the Volturi ("New Moon"). It's difficult to get invested in this conflict at the last minute, and again feels like a lazy, tacked-on, "oh right, I am writing a book, maybe something should happen!" move from the author. Of course, as someone who hopes to be successful at writing teen fantasy, it's depressing to know that all I would need to do to achieve this success is construct a BORING SUE HEROINE, a FATED TRUE LOVE, and a ZERO HOUR PLOT. Or maybe it's not depressing...maybe it's an incredible relief! After all, coming up with those three things shouldn't be too hard. If a lazy writer like Meyers can do it, anyone can! For readers looking for good, solid teen-level fantasy featuring interesting heroines, more complex and realistic portrayals of love, and truly gripping plot, I recommend Diana Wynne Jones and Libba Bray.