Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Easily the worst written, infantile, and revolting most anticipated book of all time. Let me just say, I feel dumber after having read this book. Infantile writing, stupid plot, disgusting immoral world viewpoint all adds up to the most colossal waste of time since "Who Shot JR?". As a tip to all you readers out there, Dan Brown uses ITALICS to let you know when something is IMPORTANT. God forbid you have to figure it out for yourself, don't worry he lets you know over and over again. OMG! It got so bad I spent my time folding over pages highlighting the most egregious examples of horrifyingly bad writing. Some of my favorites included: "She produced a familiar handgun, checked the silencer, and slid it back inside her jacket pocket." We all know professional assassins who do this in broad daylight, visible in the middle of the street just to ensure that they are ready for action. They also dress conspicuously and drive vehicles (BMW motorcycles) that announce their presence from miles away. That's just good professional hygiene. Yeah right! "Paradise Twenty Five, Langdon thought, wishing his eidetic memory were strong enough to recall the entire text." Seriously? Either he has an eidetic memory or he doesn't. There are no degrees of eidetic memory. GAG! This one just bugged me: "His skin now prickling with foreboding". Really does your skin actually do that? In a just world, this book would be the end of his career or at the very least banishment to purgatory! Of course, idiots like me will turn this into a monstrous bestseller. Yet I felt compelled to speak as the opening quote says: "The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis." Exactly right. What kind of human being would I be if I didn't at least attempt to stop you from reading this abomination?