Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Come on, folks, you just bought a ten dollar sweater. Where, exactly, are you setting your bar? No, it is not made of angora. Yes, it's thin, slightly transparent, and rather delicate. Do I think that it would survive a trip through the washer along with button-fly jeans, hook and eye bras, an unzipped hoodie, a wad of velcro, and a crocodile? Not a chance but why are you guys washing your sweaters and your crocodiles in the same load to begin with? Don't you know that crocodiles prefer the gentle cycle? What does it smell like? It smells like fabric that was in a plastic bag inside a plastic bag inside a container on a slow boat from China. Air it out and it will be fine. Anything that is shipped from any long distance will have a smell similar, even your high end designer items smell like this when they are taken out of the package - that's why you see the hired help steaming away in the back room (it's not just for wrinkles, ya' know). The fit... Does it fit *just* *like* *the* *picture*?? No. It absolutely does not. Am I shocked?? Am I angry?? YES!!! Why? Because it until I ordered this sweater I thought that I was a 5'3" tall Asian woman so you can imagine my shock... Seriously? Come on. It clearly states in the third line of the description that the model is 5'3" and her body is very delicate and she is wearing a large sized sweater. I'm a 5'2" European woman with shoulders like an American linebacker and HIPS so does it hang on me the same way as it does on the lovely model in the photo? No, not at all. Did I expect that it would? Not for a second. But, see, here's the thing: I have been buying clothes for myself for a while now and I own a mirror or two and I know what I look like and what I'm shaped like and I was able to look at the photo of the model and the dimensions of the sweater and then draw a reasonable conclusion as to what it would be like on me. So. It's a ten dollar sweater that is extremely soft - shockingly so, really - and very comfortable and I'm wearing it right now over top of a tank top with some leggings feeling all Jennifer Beals (what a feeling - now you know how old I am) wondering where my leg warmers are. TEN DOLLARS!! It is the best value for the money you're going to find. Will your dog's nails snag it? Probably, but that could be said of a lot of sweaters. Will your children be able to inherit it from you? Probably not. Will it keep you warm in sub-zero temperatures? Absolutely not. Will it magically give you the physique of a 5'3" Asian woman? Oh, yeah. Totally.