Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Walked into the break room at work for a glass of ice water. Noticed a container of this sitting on the shelf. Thought it might flavor my plain water reasonably well so I mixed some up. Blue Raspberry. I read the label as I stirred. "May cause flushing and tingling". I smirked, thinking that wouldn't be an issue. Background: 5'11", 270 lbs. A walking wall that spends an inordinate amount of time lifting large weights. I don't use supplements but am peripherally aware of their function. This is labeled as a pre-workout supplement. I figured that since I was going to the gym later, it couldn't hurt. The taste was delicious. Sour and refreshing. Within a couple minutes, my face went numb. I laughed, thinking maybe there was something to that warning label. Soon, the tingling spread to my arms, legs and chest. Then the itching started. The whole body itching that someone might experience after swimming in a lake of toxic waste. The label didn't mention the itching. Then the caffeine kicked in. I think that the manufacturer forgot to mention that one of the secret ingredients was methamphetamine. Proprietary blend, with a sprinkle of cocaine. I literally couldn't blink. Had I been surrounded by a group of angry police officers, I suspect the ensuing viral video would have been epic. One review mentioned that this product is 'Fire'. That phrase went though my mind prior to reading it. It took about two hours for the product to wear off. The itching was unnerving. Ten hours later and my tongue still hurts. I never did get to the gym. This product would likely be awesome during the first hour of a Zombie Apocalypse, as your situational awareness will be off the charts. You'll feel as strong as a gorilla and the itching will keep you moving. I don't know if sweating would help mitigate the itching but I suspect not. When I get back into work on Monday, that container will still be sitting there. Calling me. Tempting me. Part of my brain will shout "Remember the itching!". Another part will whisper "Remember the rush...." I'll probably opt for a glass of water and think about zombies.