Bests & Worsts Reviews from Amazon

Let me preface this by saying there is probably something medically wrong with me. I take huge dumps. Abnormally large ones. Obviously this can be problematic, as some toilets just can't handle the kind of lumber that I'm laying down. I recently moved into a new apartment, and it is amazing. EXCEPT that the toilet is crappy, pun intended. This thing gets clogged pretty much every time I "lay some cable." I started off using one of those cheap ass old fashioned wood rod with a red suction cup plungers. It was a horrorshow. Poop water was splashing all over the damn place and ruining the bathmat, plus somehow the damn dog always managed to get some on him which he would then shake and spray all over the rest of the place. IT JUST WAS A BAD SITUATION. So I came on the ole amazon dot com to look at some plungers and what do you know I see this weird looking blue bellows type thing. Now just looking at it I knew, THIS THING HAD SOME ENGINEERING BEHIND IT. Some random dude didn't just slam a suction cup on a dowel and call it a day. THIS THING MEANS BUSINESS, AND ITS BUSINESS IS DISLODGING OVERSIZED TURDS FROM THE HALF ASS PLUMBING SYSTEM MY LANDLORD INSTALLED. Like I said, I probably have some sort of medical issue. Still, this bad boy gets the job done without spraying water all over like the damn bishop is in town giving out blessings.